As today is Valentine's Day, I expect to see many of my friends from the LDS SSA community posting memes following a theme of "Forever Alone." I don't feel lonely today. In fact, I feel great! I was able to spend time with cousins and blew the crap out of a bunch of junk using shotguns. Very fulfilling. I expect, however, that Valentine's Days won't always be this easy, this simple.
The idea of romance associated with this day reminded me of a conversation I had a while back with a recent convert. This new friend also experiences ssa. He once asked me "If the church were to change its policy on same-sex marriage, would you marry a man?"
I've heard this question before, and honestly, it really bothers me. Big time.
Part of the package that the Church comes in is its strict dedication to idea that God is unchanging and that we have no authority to change His laws. Opponents to this belief argue that the Church changed its policy on polygamy and who could hold the priesthood. While the safest answer to this argument is "we don't know," it certainly isn't the most satisfying.
However, if we examine these two "changes" within the context of the scriptures, we find that at no point in time was everyone and anyone able to hold the priesthood authority of God. From what I've gathered, the priesthood was limited to few men leading up until the time of Moses, when the tribe of Levi was given such keys. For whatever reason, be it sociocultural otherwise, God chose not to extend this power to all morally worthy men until the 1900s.
In a similar vein, polygamy has not always been practiced in God's organizations here on earth. Only through His permission were certain men allowed to have more than one wife (the Old Testament has multiple examples of this condoned behavior).
On the other hand, throughout the entire Bible and Book of Mormon, never has homosexual behavior been acceptable in the eyes of God. While both polygamy and the limitation of eligible priesthood holders have clear instances in sacred text, homosexual relations have none.
With these facts in mind, the idea that our Heavenly Father would uproot thousands of years of consistent chastity law to accept a lifestyle so counterproductive to the Plan of Salvation doesn't make sense to me. Unsurprisingly, it's very difficult for me to imagine what I would do should the Church change its stance on marriage. My testimony would be shaken, if not shattered. With increasingly fewer exceptions, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the only major religious organization still defending traditional marriage. It seems that other churches are eroding to the relentless tide of public scrutiny, bending their policies to fit the modern mold of moral relativism. If our Church was to follow suit, I would begin to doubt its divinity.
So I see the question he asked me as unanswerable. At the time, I told him that I still wouldn't, because I know that the path I would follow as an actively homosexual man would never bring me true peace and satisfaction. I would not reach a sense of divine fulfillment or have the kind of family I've always wanted.
Don't get me wrong; there is unquestionably a part of me that would love to be married to another man. This makes answering my friend's question that much harder.
I do know, however, that all the blessings of the Father will be available to me as I continue to follow His plan and commandments. It isn't helpful or healthy for me to dwell on the earlier-proposed question, so I'll be moving on now.